You Know Your Mother Is A Nigerian… When you say, “Mummy, I’m Sorry!” And she replies, “Sorry for yourself!”
When you ask her where you should drop something and she says, “Drop it on my head.”
When you say, ”Mummy, I have fever.” And she replies you, “Why won’t you have fever when you press phone every day.”
When you say, “Mummy I took 2nd in my class.” and she replies, “So the person that took first has two heads abi?”
When she takes the dstv remote to work, just to punish you.
When you are watching television with her and then she sleeps off and still doesn’t want you to change the channel.
If when you tell her you are going to a friend’s place and she asks, ”When last did that friend come here to play with you?”
When she asks you if the food is enough, and you reply no, and she says, “Come and eat her join.”
When she tells you, “If I hear Peem, you will hear ween!”
When with one look she tells you, “You will get the beating of your life when you get home.”
When you say, ”I want to die!” And she says, ”You will not die in Jesus name!”
When she tells you, ”I didn’t kill my mother, so you will not kill me”.
When she calls you from your room upstairs and then sends you back upstairs to bring her purse.
When you ask her to help you with your homework and she says, ”Go and meet your sister.” You then say, ”So Mummy you don’t even know it.” And she replies, ”It is your daddy’s family members that doesn’t know it.”
When you ask her to refund the money you borrowed her and she tells you, “All the food you have been eating in the house NKOR? Which money did you think was used in buying them?